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> Season 1 Quotes, funniest quotes from the first season
nonjewishkyle
post Oct 11 2006, 06:47 PM
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Chef: Okay children, I know that you're all extremely excited and nervous and anxious about the homecoming game against the Middle Park.
Kyle: Who's Middle Park?
Cartman: What's homecoming? laugh.gif


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"I Would Never Kill Somebody, Not Unless They Pissed Me Off!!" - Eric Theodore Cartman
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City Wok Guy
post Oct 11 2006, 06:50 PM
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Lol that was a funny quote, there was a good quote in starvin marvin but I forgot it . sad.gif


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Traeh
post Oct 11 2006, 07:06 PM
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Chef: "Morning glory..." (the pig and the elephant are waking up)
(the elephant notices the pig and lets out a frightened noise)
Chef: "Oh, I know how that must feel, it sucks waking up next to a pig.
(the pig covers her eyes and lets out a sigh)
...or a big fat elephant!"


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nonjewishkyle
post Oct 11 2006, 07:09 PM
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Haha...Good one Traeh! My favorite episode biggrin.gif


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nonjewishkyle
post Oct 11 2006, 07:32 PM
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Both from episode 106 "Death" tongue.gif

Ms. Cartman: Eric dear? I just got a call from your friend Kyle's mother. She said that this show is naughty, and might make you a potty mouth.
Cartman: That's a bunch of crap! Kyle's mom is a dirty Jew!
Ms. Cartman: Ohhh, okay hon.

Cartman: I would never kill somebody…not unless the piss me off.
Grampa: Ohh, is that a fact? Well, let me tell you something, Porky. Your mom was over here earlier, and I humped her like a little bitch.
Cartman: What!
Grampa: That's right.
Stan: Grampa!
Grampa: And then, I dug up your great-grandma's skeleton, and had my way with her too.
Cartman: Hey!
Grampa: Choice piece of ass, your great-grandma.
Cartman: You piece of crap! I'll kill you!
Grampa: That's the spirit Tubby.
Stan: [restraining Cartman] Come on Cartman, he's just trying to get to you.
Cartman: Don't talk about my mom like that!
Stan: [dragging Cartman away] We can go watch Terrance & Phillip in the kitchen.
Grampa: I ever tell you about the time I boofed your dad, Fatso?
Cartman: Ah, I can't believe that son of a bitch!
Stan: Here Cartman, have some Snacky Cakes.
Cartman: Oooh, Snacky Cakes, god dang.


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X_Stinger
post Oct 11 2006, 07:54 PM
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hahaha nice kyle, funny shit right there


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City Wok Guy
post Oct 11 2006, 08:35 PM
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QUOTE (nonjewishkyle @ Oct 11 2006, 07:32 PM)
Both from episode 106 "Death" tongue.gif

Ms. Cartman: Eric dear? I just got a call from your friend Kyle's mother. She said that this show is naughty, and might make you a potty mouth.
Cartman: That's a bunch of crap! Kyle's mom is a dirty Jew!
Ms. Cartman: Ohhh, okay hon.

Cartman: I would never kill somebody…not unless the piss me off.
Grampa: Ohh, is that a fact? Well, let me tell you something, Porky. Your mom was over here earlier, and I humped her like a little bitch.
Cartman: What!
Grampa: That's right.
Stan: Grampa!
Grampa: And then, I dug up your great-grandma's skeleton, and had my way with her too.
Cartman: Hey!
Grampa: Choice piece of ass, your great-grandma.
Cartman: You piece of crap! I'll kill you!
Grampa: That's the spirit Tubby.
Stan: [restraining Cartman] Come on Cartman, he's just trying to get to you.
Cartman: Don't talk about my mom like that!
Stan: [dragging Cartman away] We can go watch Terrance & Phillip in the kitchen.
Grampa: I ever tell you about the time I boofed your dad, Fatso?
Cartman: Ah, I can't believe that son of a bitch!
Stan: Here Cartman, have some Snacky Cakes.
Cartman: Oooh, Snacky Cakes, god dang.

Classic is all I have to say.


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nonjewishkyle
post Oct 11 2006, 09:51 PM
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Another from "An Elephant Makes Love To A Pig"

Mr. Garrison: Well, spank my ass and call me Charlie. Isn't this exciting, two A+ students in a cloning war.
Mr. Hat: Yes Mr. Garrison, genetic engineering lets us correct God's horrible, horrible mistakes, like German people.

Hahahaha one of my #1 favorites! laugh.gif laugh.gif laugh.gif


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City Wok Guy
post Oct 11 2006, 09:59 PM
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QUOTE (nonjewishkyle @ Oct 11 2006, 09:51 PM)
Another from "An Elephant Makes Love To A Pig"

Mr. Garrison: Well, spank my ass and call me Charlie. Isn't this exciting, two A+ students in a cloning war.
Mr. Hat: Yes Mr. Garrison, genetic engineering lets us correct God's horrible, horrible mistakes, like German people.

Hahahaha one of my #1 favorites! laugh.gif laugh.gif laugh.gif

Thats awful but at the same time fucking halrious.


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tis_me_lord
post Oct 12 2006, 12:04 AM
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"Wow, I haven't seen a Jewish kid run like that since Poland 1938."
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nonjewishkyle
post Oct 12 2006, 01:17 AM
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QUOTE (tis_me_lord @ Oct 12 2006, 12:04 AM)
"Wow, I haven't seen a Jewish kid run like that since Poland 1938."

GREAT one!!! wink.gif


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Chicken Lover
post Oct 13 2006, 02:48 AM
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These are from Volcano

Stan: Uncle Jimbo, we don't drink beer.
Jimbo: What?!
Ned: Oh yeah that's right I don't think 8 year olds drink beer.
Kyle: I like chocolate milk.
Jimbo: Well, we'll be doin' plenty of drinkin' on this hunting trip. After all, hunting sober is like… fishing… sober.

Jimbo: What's wrong with you?
Stan: I don't wanna shoot the bunny.
Jimbo: What do you mean you don't wanna shoot the bunny? You're babbling. You're not making any sense. You're hysterical!

Stan: Cartman always makes stuff up, Ned. You can't believe anything he says.
Cartman: Hey, I'll blow your friggin' head off.
Jimbo: (rushing up) Hey, look out son, that's dangerous. You're gonna spill your beer.

Jimbo:Well, here we are. Okay, each of you young 'uns take a gun, a beer and some smokes.

Mrs. Cartman: Be sure to use lots of bug spray, and if you have to poo-poo, don't wipe with poison ivy.
(Stan, Kyle, & Kenny laugh)
Cartman: Dude, that's sick mom.
Mrs. Cartman: And I know it can get scary up in those woods, but just remember, mommy's not far away.
(The boys laugh some more.)
Cartman: (to Jimbo) Drive, drive!
Mrs. Cartman: You give your mommy a kissy.
Cartman: Drive the car damn it, drive!


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X_Stinger
post Oct 15 2006, 08:02 PM
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lol best one from the volcano:
Remember, if a volcano erupts stop, drop, and roll.
Chef: Thats the biggest pile of bullshit ive ever seen.


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Stan Marsh
post Oct 18 2006, 06:00 PM
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what about cartman gets an anol probe when there on the skl buss kenny is worried bout icke n stan farts, kenny "dude you farted" but cmon he was spos 2 b worried, lol


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EricCartman91
post Oct 19 2006, 09:52 PM
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QUOTE (X_Stinger @ Oct 15 2006, 08:02 PM)
lol best one from the volcano:
Remember, if a volcano erupts stop, drop, and roll.
Chef: Thats the biggest pile of bullshit ive ever seen.

Actually, it was "Duck and Cover" but yeah, it was hilarious...

-Ericcartman91 smile.gif


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